Countdown to August 1

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Worries and fears

Oh my Jesus, please be with me. Please send Your Spirit to guide me. I cannot do this without You - there is no reason to my doing this without You, because You are the reason.

Sitting in my kitchen, warming water and mixing apple sauce to make bread, waiting for 7:30 to roll around...

Lord, I am afraid of so many things.

I am afraid to leave medical school early - whether it is after one semester or two. I am afraid of what my professors and advisers will think. I am afraid to leave my classmates with one less person in the class. We are supposed to be in this 5 year journey together. I am afraid to tell my family. I am afraid to give up Christmas and Thanksgiving with them.

So many fears about what I would be leaving behind...but Lord, please, remind me of what I am leaving it all behind for.

Come, follow Me.


None of it makes any sense without You, the eternal Bridegroom, staring back at me from the monstrance. Loving me into life.

I do not want to live my life in fear. I want to live boldly, joyfully, courageously for You. I want to give my entire being to You - my entire self, body and soul.

I ran so far...will You take me back again?

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